In being separated by such a distance of time and space, I am surviving the best that I can, but am still somewhat afraid of the unknown. I am alone only in my heart and my mind. The people that I have brought into my life are both loving and supportive. They are decent in a place where decency is not too common. Though I have been coming here for years, it seems so different living outside the box. My pastor says the reason I came here was to recapture some of the happiness that I have been missing, that I once had when I was here, he is correct. I am and I did. And yet, here I still am, outside myself looking in , not distracted by anything I don't put in my own way. I am alone but not completely. There are new voices on the other end of the phone, they are accepting of me.

I miss him, every moment we shared here is relived everyday. The pain is lessening but the emptiness remains. The only fear I have is that I shall never be a complete person again because he is no longer a part of me. In all sense of the word, he really did complete me.